Having worked with clients in all stages and forms of relationship—including with a spouse, partner, child, parent, boss, employee—one of the most rewarding for me has been helping the client who is examining relationship with SELF.
In particular, I find this relationship critical to successful career shifts and increased levels of self-confidence and self-esteem essential to overall happiness.
Seth Godin, a well-known entrepreneur, author and public speaker is quoted as saying “Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don’t need to escape from.”
Because of my own shift (some might say ALT + TAB) from one career to something vastly different (“Sales to counseling, Lori?! Are you crazy??”), I have a natural affinity for those looking to make a career change—and have a true appreciation of the critical role relationship to SELF plays in successful transition.
Many of my clients have successfully navigated job promotions and/or career changes (usually in six sessions or fewer) because they are generally coachable, have an inherently strong work ethic, and typically employ a “can-do attitude” even if they are not feeling particularly good about their current work/life situation.
Typically, the trajectory to higher levels of desired success (and the relative income-earning potential) comes from within–the answers are right THERE. Often, people who are unhappy in their current work situation simply need a safe and secure place to be able to think out loud (with an unbiased third party) while exploring all available options from “worst case scenario” to the unbridled pursuit of their greatest passion(s).
The most important thing to understand if you are exploring a position and/or career change is your relationship with SELF has more to do with your successful commencement of a new chapter than almost any other relationship—including the relationship between you and your spouse or partner, you and valuable contacts within your network, and even between you and your current and future employer.
Job/career shifts can feel overwhelming because so much of our identity is tied to our work: what we do with our specific skills and experience every day, where we do it, with whom, and to what standard of living. Letting go of that identity—inside our own mind and heart–almost immediately clears mind and heart-share of the unnecessary “I am THIS; I am not THAT”-type assumptions likely forged in the past and likely having little or NO bearing on our future.
Letting go of false assumptions is easy for some and difficult for others. For me, with over two decades of successful executive leadership/management under my belt and a large network of people who knew me specifically because of my professional success, my biggest obstacle was LETTING GO and LETTING IN.
This last piece—Letting IN—is critical. “Letting Go” sounds scary—skydiving should not come to mind when thinking of a career change. But if we understand we are replacing what is no longer TRUE for what IS true now (e.g., “I no longer derive a lot of personal fulfillment from corporate sales; I have always been good and enjoyed helping people realize their personal and professional potential; and I now find I am increasingly interested in the science and benefits of healthy relationships”) we begin to feel a natural, inner calm and strength which promotes exploration and growth. This is the “Letting IN.”
I help clients identify what is true for them now versus what is no longer true—personally and professionally. When a client is able to successfully identify his or her truth, it is almost instantaneously empowering and a natural source of strength, improved self-esteem and confidence.
Here are a few tips to position yourself to let go of what is no longer right, let in what is right for you, and begin your next career chapter:
Assume Your Future: A career shift of any size—construction to accounting, line to staff, corporate to off-the-grid—may feel scary because you don’t yet KNOW you belong in the new career space. Assume you will get there, that you will feel safer and more fulfilled and more energized than you do today.
Scary Sea Change or Easy Puddle Jump? Your Choice! No shock and awe necessary (unless, of course, that’s your real style and comfort zone). What I mean here is that you can and should take very small steps toward your new career while maintaining your old one. Unless you have an unusually large cushion of savings, you will likely feel more secure this way. You will identify pieces of your old career you can and should apply to your new one. You will be able to fine-tune where you naturally fit in to your new career space, e.g., “Do I want to run an architectural firm or work independently from my home?” “Do I want to design and build custom surfboards or teach surfing?” “Do I want to teach grade school kids or work on curriculum development behind the scenes?” No sea change necessary—just puddle jumps, one by one.
Who Says So? An important caveat here is that the consideration of a career change may NOT be internally motivated and thus may not be your truth. If the motivation is coming from external sources, consider: a. Who is telling me to change? b. What is their motivation? c. Do they know me the way I know myself? d. Do they have my best interests at heart? e. (By the way, the caution above applies to people resisting your pursuit of a career change as well.)
Relationship to Self: Most importantly, know that your relationship with YOU—how well you know, accept, love and nurture yourself—is the most critical factor in your successful career shift. I help clients every day remove barriers to self-love, self-knowledge, and self-actualization.
Finally, remember that in life there are many chapters. Keep reading—and writing—the book of YOU.